Counting the Cost

I'm pretty relational. My family and friends mean the world to me. So while I am doing great stuff... tra la la ing around the world... and living my dream smack in the middle of Africa... there is still a cost.

This came back to mind last week when I was meeting with the YFC guys. We were reflecting on what it costs us to follow the Lord. Most of the time I quite easily press on and do not have to think about the voids... but there are moments when it comes flooding back.

My cost is being 2 days journey from my family, and a ridiculous scattering of my closest friends who are considerably spread across four countries.

I'm not complaining, just surveying the cost.

Last night I phoned my great aunt who is dying in a hospital in central Texas. Another funeral I will not be able to attend. So I'm somewhat processing what I'm missing and who I'm not there for.

But I would be so wrong if I were not here. It's just that everything has a cost and for me relationships are priceless. One of those things in life that when the Lord says 'lay down your life and follow me' I have to be obedient and intentionally position myself so that I can truthfully say "I'll follow Him no matter the cost." It is one thing to say... but another thing to live.

And there is a cost.

I choose to invest who I am where I am... give fully and freely of everything I have... so this means that whenever it is time to go, I have to lay down my relationships once again and count the cost.

It takes a while to establish relationships. I do not really have a community in Burundi yet or a place of belonging. It will take time.

Meanwhile, I press on. I enjoy the skype chats, emails from friends, and sprinkling of letters. Community will come and I'm glad God made us relational for a reason. It means we're not meant to live our lives in a vacuum or withhold who we are from others. It is a reminder that we're created in His image and that if I'm relational... He most certainly is. It encourages me to be intentional about my relationship with my Father... and intentional about my relationships with others.